Most young people spend their time daily dreaming about getting married someday and having a happy home. But the road that leads to a happy marriage has many “pitfalls” along the way.
A pitfall is a carefully concealed trap. On the surface, it looks harmless, but when you walk on it, you will fall into a deep pit.
Satan is an expert at building “pitfalls” his carefully concealed traps look innocent enough, but they are deadly. Some of these “pitfalls” can keep you from ever having marriage and a happy home.
Let us therefore consider them one by one.
Saturday, November 7, 2009
1 Living for the Moment:
The “live for the moment” philosophy is everywhere! We are bombarded with the idea: “You only go through life once, so grab for the gusto you can!”
This way of thinking is as old as the hills. In time past it went under the saying “eat, drink, and be merry for tomorrow we die.” One thing wrong with this is that we don’t usually die tomorrow. Instead, we have to live with our mistakes; some sins have lifetime consequences and must also face judgment for them after death.
Satan has always tried to promote the idea of living for the moment with wrong motives because it causes people to do things they would never do if they considered the future. Life is more than what you see now. Its the rest of your life here and forever in the next world which is heaven or hell. If you reject Jesus Christ you will end up in hell. You are not here just to live but to fulfill a purpose.
How to avoid this pitfall: recognize the seriousness and sacredness of life. Remember that what you do now will definitely affect you both this life and your life after now
This way of thinking is as old as the hills. In time past it went under the saying “eat, drink, and be merry for tomorrow we die.” One thing wrong with this is that we don’t usually die tomorrow. Instead, we have to live with our mistakes; some sins have lifetime consequences and must also face judgment for them after death.
Satan has always tried to promote the idea of living for the moment with wrong motives because it causes people to do things they would never do if they considered the future. Life is more than what you see now. Its the rest of your life here and forever in the next world which is heaven or hell. If you reject Jesus Christ you will end up in hell. You are not here just to live but to fulfill a purpose.
How to avoid this pitfall: recognize the seriousness and sacredness of life. Remember that what you do now will definitely affect you both this life and your life after now
2 Living for good feelings:
The slogans “if it feels good, do it” expresses another philosophy which has permeated our society. The whole world drug scene is based on the idea: “get a good feeling now, no matter what happen later.”
Some people who ought to know better think that almost anything is all right if it gives them a good feeling. There is even a song that promotes this idea with the line: “it can’t be wrong when it feels so right.”
Don’t be gullible enough to believe that just because something gives you a good feeling does not mean that it is right. You might get a good feeling out of stealing a new car and riding around in it or doping someone of his/her money or anything and because you feel good when using them wouldn’t make it right.
How to avoid this pitfall: Don’t let your feelings control your actions
Some people who ought to know better think that almost anything is all right if it gives them a good feeling. There is even a song that promotes this idea with the line: “it can’t be wrong when it feels so right.”
Don’t be gullible enough to believe that just because something gives you a good feeling does not mean that it is right. You might get a good feeling out of stealing a new car and riding around in it or doping someone of his/her money or anything and because you feel good when using them wouldn’t make it right.
How to avoid this pitfall: Don’t let your feelings control your actions
3 Sexual immoralities:
It’s easy for young people to fall into the pitfall of sexual immorality. Many are into sex sins, and they seem to be getting away with it. But no one can violet God’s moral laws without sooner or later paying a terrible price. A single act of immorality can have tragic consequences which may include contracting a venereal disease, unwanted pregnancy, a stop to fulfill purpose, untimely death, etc.
How to avoid this pitfall: Keep yourself pure. Remember that your body is a temple of the Living God, you are a part of God, Jesus paid so dearly for you to have you back to God and you are so costly. What you get out of immorality is not worth what it costs you.
How to avoid this pitfall: Keep yourself pure. Remember that your body is a temple of the Living God, you are a part of God, Jesus paid so dearly for you to have you back to God and you are so costly. What you get out of immorality is not worth what it costs you.
4 Teen marriages:
Those who marry in their teen are asking for trouble. Teen marriages are twice as likely to end in divorce as those of couples who were in their twenties when they married. The odds are even worse when the bride is under eighteen.
There are at least two major disadvantages to teen marriages. First of all, if you try to choose your marriage partner while you are still in your teens, you will probably make a wrong choice. Secondary, most teens are not mature enough to handle marriage. It requires large amounts of unselfish, caring love to make a marriage work, and it takes a lot of “growing up” before a person has that kind of love.
How to avoid this pitfall: take your time about getting married –lots of time.
There are at least two major disadvantages to teen marriages. First of all, if you try to choose your marriage partner while you are still in your teens, you will probably make a wrong choice. Secondary, most teens are not mature enough to handle marriage. It requires large amounts of unselfish, caring love to make a marriage work, and it takes a lot of “growing up” before a person has that kind of love.
How to avoid this pitfall: take your time about getting married –lots of time.
5 5 Marring to escape the problems of being single:
Girls need to over the idea that the chief end of life is marriage. The fear of missing the last chance for “marital bliss” causes many a girl to ignore her better judgment and jump into a disastrous marriage. She may see a number of warning flags, but she thinks, “Well, it probably won’t be the best marriage in the world, but what could be worse than living alone”?
The answer to this is “a bad marriage is much worse than living alone” women by the untold thousands could tell you that a bad marriage is among the most miserable experiences that anyone can have on this earth. It is filled with hatred, rejection, resentment and hurt feelings. And often children are the innocent victims of such a marriage.
How to avoid this pitfall: learn to be happy and satisfied while you are single, and you won’t feel pressured to jump into unwise marriage. Then prepare yourself.
The answer to this is “a bad marriage is much worse than living alone” women by the untold thousands could tell you that a bad marriage is among the most miserable experiences that anyone can have on this earth. It is filled with hatred, rejection, resentment and hurt feelings. And often children are the innocent victims of such a marriage.
How to avoid this pitfall: learn to be happy and satisfied while you are single, and you won’t feel pressured to jump into unwise marriage. Then prepare yourself.
Marring someone with the expectation of changing him/her is about like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute. The chances of landing are about the same in both cases.
As risky as it is, many girls and boys are still willing to gamble on their future happiness by marrying someone in the hope of changing him/her. A girl may argue with her, “I know Iyke drinks too much and chases other girls, but I think he will change after we are married.”
This is wishful thinking and it is 100% wrong. You do not change a person’s basic nature by marrying him. If there are problems before marriage, they will likely be worse after marriage.
How to avoid this pitfall: don’t expect to change a person after marriage. What you see is what you get.
7 trying out sex before marriage: trying out sex before marriage is often presented as a very reasonable course of action. A boy will say, “You wouldn’t buy a pair of shoes without trying them, so why marry without first of trying out sex”?
There are several reasons why the “try it out first” the idea is not good. Marrying someone cannot be compared to buying a pair of shoes. A woman is not to be thought as a piece of merchandise to be “tried out,” but a life partner to be loved and cherished. She is precious and priceless in Gods sight, and she ought to be the same in your sight. Remember, your looking for a life partner not just a sex partner.
Furthermore, a before-marriage test of sex is not a valid sample of what sex will be like within the marriage.
How to avoid this pitfall: don’t accept the foolish “try out sex before marriage” idea. If you have real love going for you, you don’t need to worry about your sex life being good. It will be!
As risky as it is, many girls and boys are still willing to gamble on their future happiness by marrying someone in the hope of changing him/her. A girl may argue with her, “I know Iyke drinks too much and chases other girls, but I think he will change after we are married.”
This is wishful thinking and it is 100% wrong. You do not change a person’s basic nature by marrying him. If there are problems before marriage, they will likely be worse after marriage.
How to avoid this pitfall: don’t expect to change a person after marriage. What you see is what you get.
7 trying out sex before marriage: trying out sex before marriage is often presented as a very reasonable course of action. A boy will say, “You wouldn’t buy a pair of shoes without trying them, so why marry without first of trying out sex”?
There are several reasons why the “try it out first” the idea is not good. Marrying someone cannot be compared to buying a pair of shoes. A woman is not to be thought as a piece of merchandise to be “tried out,” but a life partner to be loved and cherished. She is precious and priceless in Gods sight, and she ought to be the same in your sight. Remember, your looking for a life partner not just a sex partner.
Furthermore, a before-marriage test of sex is not a valid sample of what sex will be like within the marriage.
How to avoid this pitfall: don’t accept the foolish “try out sex before marriage” idea. If you have real love going for you, you don’t need to worry about your sex life being good. It will be!
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